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11:38am 14/01/2005
mood: sick
Well i just finished my Marketing midterm and before this one i had American Government...fun fun. Not exactly, well the only good thing about having midterms is you get to leave school at 11:30. Then no school on Monday, then 2 midterms on Tuesday and then i dont need to be here Wednesday. So its all good. I need to do something today. My mom says that i need to find something to do this weekend before i get introuble. My step sisters and my brother all got in trouble yesterday and i was surpisingly the only one not to get in trouble. It was great. I dont know what im gonna do today but i bet i wont get a phone call today either because im a loser like that. Well i cant wait to get my computer back and i dont know when thats gonna be but i havent had it for over two weeks and it sucks. But im out cuz class is bout to end. peace

thanks ryan for getting me sick i appreciate that alot.
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Bored bored bored   
11:41am 05/01/2005
mood: hungry
Well i dont think that anybody reads this thing anymore so i dont know why i write but o well. Its better then a regular journal that my mom can read cuz i really dont want her to know how i feel, but friends, they are the best. Well my computer is screwed up and i asked my dad to fix it and he didnt have the disk to totally reformat it but he tried anyways and it XP wont go back on so he had to order a disk that will take like a week to get to his house and then ill have it but for now im stuck using the shitty computers in school! O well they work. They arent that bad. Well a lot of shit has been going on. Like when my bro had some "gum" and left it on the dryer after he took a shower, and then my moms boyfriend knew it was him but blamed in on Ryan anyways which pissed me off ALOT. And then he wasnt allowd to come over because he "lied" which i dont believe is true. And last night i talked to my mom and her boyfriend for 2 hours and hes allowed back at my house. So i was really happy. And i found out that loser Ryan has been lying to me. O well i dont care, its really not a big deal. Well im out cuz its time for lunch. Peace outtie.
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Survey thingy   
09:15pm 27/12/2004
mood: annoyed
[01 Dec 2004|09:39am]
. Slept in your bed : Me
. Made you cry : my mom
. You shared a drink with: i cant remember
. You went to the movies with : havent been in a long time
. You went to the mall with : my mom, my 2 bros, and my moms boyfriends kids
. Yelled at you : my mom
. Said they were going to kill you : Joe
. Said "I love you" and meant it? : hmmm nobody
. Gotten in a fight with : my mom

. Spring or fall?: spring
. Math or English?: Math
. What are you going to do after you finish this survey?: umm go to bed maybe
. What was the last food you ate?: chicken nuggets
. High school or college?: High School
. How many buddies are on?: 20
. Last movie you saw?: Bourne Supremecy
. Last time you went out of the province/state: yesterday
. What book are you reading now?: The Chocolate War
. What's on your mouse pad?: A Smiley face
. Favorite board game?: Life
. Favorite magazine?: YM, teen people, M
. Worst feeling in the world? losing someone you love, relationships changing/being ruined
. What is the first thing you think when you wake in the morning?: Great it wasnt a dream
. How many rings before you answer?: a half..maybe 1
. Chocolate or vanilla?: vanilla
. Do you sleep with a stuffed animal?: nope
. If you could have any job you wanted, what would it be?: Couldnt tell ya
. Are you a lefty, righty or ambidextrous?: righty
. Do you type with your fingers on the right keys? yeah
. What's under your bed?: random stuff, trash...
. Favorite sport to watch?: baseball, hockey (only if im there)
. Hair Color: brown
. Eye Color: brown
. Height Currently: 5'4 & 1/2
. Glasses/contacts: need glasses
. Current Age: 15
. Siblings: 2
. Siblings age: brother 9,brother 14
. Location: for me to know and u to find out
. College Plans: i really dont know
. Any Piercings: ears
. Best Friend: not sure
. Are You Timely Or Always Late: casually late
. Do You Have A Job: haha noooo
. Do You Like Being Around People: depends on who it is

. Room In house: my bedroom!
. Type of music: i like alot
. Song: Welcome to my Life...so many more
. Day Of The Week: friday night/ saturday
. Color: red/black
. Month: Spring
. crush?: yup
. boyfriend/girlfriend?: nopee
. kissed?:yes
. hating anyone?: not at all
. annoyed with sumone?: yup
. want to kill sumone?: yeah

. Cried: yeah : /
. Bought Something: i dont think so
. Gotten Sick: a cold
. Sang: yes
. Said I Love You: yuppp to many times, but no one really cares...
. Wanted To Tell Someone You Loved them: yeah and did
. Met Someone New: yep
. Moved On: no i wish i could
. Talked To Someone: yes
. Had A Serious Talk: no
. Missed Someone: yes
. Hugged Someone: yes
. Kissed Someone: yep
. Fought With Your Parents: yes :
. Wanted This Survey To Be Over: not really,its fun!:)
Good to Bad   
08:57pm 27/12/2004
mood: aggravated
Well today started off good, but by the end of the day i didnt wanna stay home. Well i had nothing to do so i called up Ryan and invited him over. My mom went and picked him up and he came over and everything was fine. Jeff gave us a couple butts each and we chilled in my room for a while. Well my mom and Jeff started fighting and they are right now still. Me and Mikey decided to walk Ryan like half way home so he didnt have to leave by himself. So as were walking..we made it to Wilsonville and what do u know, Jeff pulls up in his truck and stops in the middle of the road and is staring at us. I stop to see if hes going to say anything but as soon as i stop he peels up all the way up the road, my brother is on his bike and decides to go home to make sure my mom is okay. I keep walking down the road until Porter Plain and then i turn around and walk home...i was freezing by the time i got home. Then when i get home Jeff makes me feel like shit because my brother came right home and i didnt. So Mikey got rewarded with 3 hours of online time. As soon as i walk in the door Jeff calls me over and starts bitching at me about why him and my mom are fighting...thanx for involving me...And he tells me how my mom flung her slippers off and he thru them in the fire. He told me how him and my mom were an inch away from being thru. I just sat there cuz to tell you the thruth i dont care at all. He told me how he hates it here...i do too, but you dont see me doing anything about it. Hes bragging, "oh if it wasnt for me you guys wouldnt have anything" well im sorry to say but before you came along we were doing fine my mom had a job...and believe it or not SHE HAD HER OWN RUNNING CAR TOO!!! But no as soon as we come here my mom has to quit her job and cant have another one so therefore she cant pay for her car so that got repossessed. So he totally fucked her over and now were stuck here. But my mom says shes finding a job and were leaving...good i hope we do, even tho deep down in my heart i dont think its gonna happen..but well see. My mom took off her ring and thru it and shes pretty pissed off right now. I dont know whats gonna happen now. I just hope that everything turns out for the best.

I love it how i cant joke around with anybody they take it all serious. Well now im fucked cuz my best friends pissed at me...sux cuz theres alot of shit going on as it is.

Well im out for now cuz i dont feel like writting anymore. Leave a comment if you care.
01:59pm 14/12/2004
mood: energetic
Well right now im in Mr O'Briens class...for all you who dont know what class that is its American Government. Were supposed to be working on this gay project but it doesnt interest me at all thats probably why im not helpin my partner. Well there has been alot of shit thats happened in the past couple months. I have AOL again so i will probably be updating this more often. Well my best friend moved and now im not friends with Brandy which sux because she goes and tells Kayla shit that i dont even do. Cuz i asked people if it was true and they all said no and that it was there own decision not to talk to her. Not my fault. I have been hanging out with Ryan alot more. I told him that he was my life, now he gets pissed when i say that i have no life. Its all good tho. He came over Sunday and we chilled with Cassandra in my room. I love when he comes over i get to beat him up all the time. I love it. We have this new trust thing at home now too. My mom said that shes not gonna ground me anymore cuz everytime i get grounded Jeff takes me off so its pointless. Damn straight. So now she knows i smoke butts and she knows that i have "tried pot 'twice'" Haha alot she knows ive been completely shit faced in front of her 3 times and she didnt know and she said if i ever did it she could tell....b-b-b-b-bullshit. She doesnt know what shes talking about. "but i dont do that shit no more" shh dont tell. I hope i dont get parent guardian now cuz i dont want my mom invading my privacy more then she already does. WEll im out for now cuz i need to pee before its time to leave and theres less then 10 min left so peace out leave some love.

<3 sara

-Erica we need to start chillin agian like we used to lu girl
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09:46am 26/10/2004
mood: energetic
***The best accesorie a girl can have is her best friend***

Well things have been getting better. Im no longer grounded!!! Fun fun. Ryan came over last Thurday and hes supposed to be coming over again on Thursday but i hafta be good, and im always good when im getting something that i want. I always have fun when hes around. Its cool, i have another really good friend. I had fun this weekend too. I was at Ambers house all weekend and chilled with her and Andrew and i only get my ass kiked about 10 times... maybe more i lost count after the first couple times. Hmm well theres not much more to say.

Kayla i know your having problems at home but im always here for ya!! I LYLALS!!!!

Peace Out
<3 Sara
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08:14am 19/10/2004
mood: thoughtful
Well im grounded again...as usual no tv or phone which sux. I havent talked to Ryan since Sunday when he walked all the way to my house and then he had to leave like right away and i felt so bad. But he was over there all day on Saturday and i had alot of fun. We watched this movie called Dark Harvest, it was pretty scary but not really it was kinda dumb and it was the second time i watched it. I cant wait until tomorrow cuz i will finally be ungrounded. And i can use the phone and have people over. I think Kayla got suspended, we havent been really talking much since she started hangin out wit that other chick Kayla but w/e. I cant say that it doesnt bother me cuz it does but what can i do about it? well i gotta go cuz class is almost over. leave a comment. peace out
Four Day Weekend   
05:36am 14/10/2004
mood: grateful
Well I just had a four day weekend and it wasnt as boring as i thought it would be. Kayla came over right off the bus on Friday and then we invited Mike Sean and Dan over, but my mom didnt know about it. Well she found out that they were comming before they got their because she saw the retards walking down the road but i told her i didnt know that they were comming and they let them stay until 11, even tho they had to leave around 10:30 so they could be back at mikes house by 11.It was fun. Then Kayla left Saturday and i didnt talk to her for the rest of the weekend and i really didnt do anything else either. Then Yesterday (Wed) Ryan walked over right after school and Jeff wasnt to happy about that cuz i didnt do my homework yet. But its different when it comes to his kids cuz Cassie doesnt do her homework before going to 24-7 but o well he'll get over it. Well im in school so im out before i get in trouble cuz im supposed to be doing my work. Bye bye
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Yeah im bored as fuck so i thought i would update   
08:44pm 28/09/2004
mood: hyper
Wow well right now im in the library and i bet that im some how gonna get caught cuz i usually do get caught and get thrown out of the library. O well. Thats why i hate comming here. I forgot to ask Ms. Pepe if i could stay after today i will hafta ask her soon or find someone else to stay after with. It wouldnt be so bad if i didnt hafta get a note everytime i stayed after, its not like i can go anywhere if my mom comes here to pick me up. I bet shes gonna be pissed again cuz Kayla is staying after but o well she dont know that shes staying after with me. And Jeff doesnt care, Kayla is my best friend and like the only one that i chill with out of school cuz she is the only one who invites me to do shit. This past week wasnt to bad. I went to the Homecoming dance thing...i mean i actually dressed up, it wasnt a dress or anything but i still dressed up. It wasnt to bad. i hung out with kayla, caitlyn, erin, buddy, and eric...and some other people that i didnt know but its all good. I dunno what else to say really so im outtie. peace leave some comments.

I <3 svs
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Bout Me   
11:12am 21/09/2004
mood: blah
* Name: Sara
* Birth date: September 13,1989
* Birthplace: Southbridge Hospital
* Current Location: North Grosvenordale, CT
* Eye Color: Brown
* Hair Color: Dark Brown/blond and red highlights
* Height: 5’4
* Righty or Lefty? Righty
* Zodiac Sign: Virgo
* Marital Status: Single...
* Nicknames: Sara-ra
* sex: Female
* Siblings: 6
* What did you do yesterday?: Stayed at home
* What did you do today?:Im in school
* What are you doing tomorrow?: Probably nothing as usual
* What are you listening to? Fucking gay movie of McDonalds
* What are you most afraid of?: YOU! HAHa (j/p)
* If you were a crayon, what color would you be?: Purple...i dont know who would ask this question
* Single?: Yep
* A virgin?: Yuppers
* Understanding?: For the most part
* Insecure?: All the time
* Interesting?: Hmm...you tell me...
* Friendly?: If i like you...
* Smart?: Far from it
* Moody?: If i dont like you
* Childish?: Hell yeah deffinitly
* Shy?: It really Depends
* Bored Easily?: Hell yes
* Responsible?: Sorta
*Dependable: When it comes to my friends-> yup
* Your perfect pizza?: hmmm...lemme think
* Your most embarrassing CD?: Got rid of them all
* Your current Mood?: Blah
* Your current Music?: McDonalds music from a gay movie
* Your current Hair?: uh..up?
* Your most overused phrase on AIM/AOL/MSN?: lol
* Your thoughts first waking: bologna..wtf??
* The shoes you wore today?: My wonderful DC's
* Used someone?: Never have.Never will.
* Cheated on someone? Nope
* Done something you regret?: Hasnt Everyone?
* Smoked?: Yeah....currently
* Broken the law?: Hmm...not sure
* Broken a bone?: Nope
* Skinny dipped?: Maybe (haha) no...
* Played truth or dare?: Who hasnt?
* Flashed someone?: Not that i remember...
* Mooned someone?: nah...
* Been in a physical fight?: yeah...
* Have you ever ridden in a police car? Yeah it was fun.
* Been on a plane?: yup 2 nights
* Come close to dying?: no
* Been in a sauna?: yes
* Been in a hot tub?: yeah
* Swam in the ocean?: Yeah...I love it
* Done illegal drugs?: Yeah....Shh dont tell
* Played a game that required removal of clothing?: "Yeah Twister"
* Been trashed or extremely intoxicated?: Actually..yeah
* Gotten beaten up?: Yeah right, Ill kik ur assm :)
* Considered a life of crime?: Yeah...Its a funny story
* Color your hair?: All the time
* Have tattoos?: no
* Have Piercings?: Just my ears
* Floss daily?: no
* Own a web cam?: nope
* Ever get off the damn computer?: When my mom makes me
* Collect anything?: bottles...from fun nights
* Work?: Babysiting
* Like shopping?: who doesnt?
* Smoke?: yeah
* Sing?: nah
* Want to go to college?: not sure
* Like high school?: Its okay
* Want to get married?: If i find the "one"
* Believe in yourself?: Definetly not
* Get motion sickness?: no
* Think you're a health freak?: nope not at all
* Play an instrument?: Nope
* Do you sleep with a stuffed animal?: Not lately lol
* Pepsi or Coke: Coke
* McDonald's or Burger King: Mcdonalds..
* Adidas or Nike: Nike
* Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Nestea
* Chocolate or vanilla: vanilla
* Chicken or fish: chicken
* Candy or mints: mints
* Smoked?: Yep
* Done drugs: Yep
* Made Out?: what do you think im some kind of slut?(haha)
* Gone on a date?: yea
* Gone to the mall?: yea
* Eaten an entire box of Oreos?: Eww thats gross
* Eaten sushi?: Definetly never
* Been on stage?: Yeah chorus in 5th grade
* Been dumped?: yeah
* Gone skating?: yeah
* Made homemade cookies?: Yeah
* Gone skinny dipping?: no
* Dyed your hair?: yes
* Stolen anything?: yeah
* Aliens?: no
* Angels?: no
* Heaven?: no
* God?: no
* Yourself?: Sometimes
* Ghosts?: Definetly
* Love?: More then ever
* Love at first sight?: yes
* The tooth fairy?: no
* Santa Claus?: no
* The Easter Bunny?: no
* Cupid?: nope
* Where do you want to go to college?: I want to go into the Navy
* What do you want to be when you grow up?: Couldnt tell you...
* Do you want to get married: maybe
* Do you want to have a small or big wedding?: Tiny
* Where do you want to go on your honeymoon?: I dont know
* Do you want to have children?: I dont know
* How many children do you want to have?: I dont know
* What do you want to name them?: I dont know

haha i dont know anything lol.
01:29pm 20/09/2004
mood: accomplished
Well im in Tupajs class right now...yeah i have her again and i dont like this class as much as i liked the one last year but its all good. I dont have AOL anymore so i cant update this shit at home but theres always the wonderful school. We're supposed to be doing this project right now but i dont want to present it so im just not gonna do it. Maybe ill decide to do it later who knows with me. My life has surprisingly gotten better then it was before. My mom and Jeff decided to try this new trust thing out with me and if i lie then i lose all my freedom but if i tell the truth then its all good. I had a birthday party on Saturday and it was fun. Mike Jimmy Ranee and Teresa came from Worcester and then Amber Andrew Ryan and Kayla were there to. It was pretty fun but it oculd have been alot better. I guess my mom says that wre keepin a cat i dont know how long thats gonna last tho. Our other cat Bubbles is issing i think she got ate by a cyote. Which kindas sux she was a good cat. Our neighbors cat is missing to. And i gave my cat Gavin to our neighbor. My mom says taht im grounded until i find something else to do after school so im just gonna say im a tutor and stay after school a couple days a week until she comes to pick Cassandra up from practice which is around 4. What a long time to be doing nothing. O well atleast i wont be grounded. Well im outtie class is almost over then 1 more period until i go home...which i dont wanna go home today cuz im grounded from everything but the computer so w/e peace out
09:41pm 20/06/2004
mood: drained
Well for being grounded this weekend was pretty fun. Friday as you all know was the last day of school. Then Saturday i went to Ambers house because my mom and her boyfriend went to Vermont and Jeff (my moms boyfriend) kids went to their aunts house. Ambers was wicked fun. First when i got there i was gonna shoot myself because i was so bored but i got to be funny. First i was makin a flame thrower thingy with my lighter and body spray i kept catchin my hand on fire, and then i showed Amber the sock trick and she was amazed lol. Then being the cool kids that we are listened to Britney Spears and N'sync it was so funny to watch amber dance to it...Then we chilled and watched Spirit which is actually a good movie. (For a cartoon) Even though my favorite cartoon movie is Ice Age...(So funny) Then today we woke up and i was finishing watching Spirit then Amber went online forever and we went to say happy fathers day to my pepe..and we stopped at Brooks...AND GUESS WHO I SAW.....My old neighbors christian and justin, i miss them sooo much they were awesome. And i stopped and talked to them, then we went back to ambers house and her mom made steak but it was dripping blood when it was "done" so me and Amber threw it out to the dogs and the screen fell out so amber climbed out her window into the dog pen. And im probably boring you all but im bored. And i guess ill stop there....haha.

HaPpY hApPy JoY jOy   
08:17pm 18/06/2004
mood: energetic
Wow im deffintly kool now haha, yeah right that would be the day. Yup makin fun of myself again...its a daily thing tho. Schools out and im happy...I skipped all my classes today...IM so glad that KAYLA CAME BACK TODAY! We hung out and didnt go to class but then she left early with Kasey and Erin and i had to cover for her for the rest of the time...But its all good. She is still havin her party but i cant fuckin go because my mom has to be fuckin stupid. And i was really lookin forward to it too. Since she left early i cleaned out her locker for her and took her stuff home with me and now im not gonna be able to see her. Hopefully she goes to ambers sat and we can al sleepover. Amber should have other people come over and we can play man hunt. That would be great lol. I cant wait to go over there, i love it when i can get away from this house and go see my friends...like i have any...but o yeah i already found this out at the strawberry festival... THE GROUND IS MOVING!!! LMFAO...so funny. Water fights, soda fights, jumpin on the moon bounce before the fair started, runnin around, "playin in traffic" walkin around...free popcorn, eating three leaf clovers..(yummy) haha, so much more...Amber and mike are the best to chill wit..

ERICA IS MY SUNDAY BUDDY!!! Girl i love you and we hafta chill over the summer.

Kayla you better go to ambers this weekend so i can see you because now im grounded.

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Sweet Life   
10:10pm 17/06/2004
mood: bouncy
Today was the best day ever. Amber and Mike are officially the best people that there are on this earth. Love ya guys. Today at the strawberry festival was awesome, so many great memories...like on the way there when we stopped at that dump thingy to get selves and i poked the bee hive and we all ran, i thought meme was talking to her self but she was on the cell. All the water fights..."playing in traffic"moon bounce. So much more. Things have been so messed up in my life lately and i deffinitly needed this day, it took so many things off my mind that i havent been able to get off for months. It was great.

Woah Baby   
07:31pm 16/06/2004
mood: bitchy
Well today didnt go as good as i hoped. Brandy wrote me a note sayin she wanted to be my friend and that pissed me off so much i just had to blow steam off because i cant talk to no one about anything so its all bottled up inside and i hate it. I dont know what to think anymore and it sux im so confused...i need help lol...Post if ya got any ideas for me.

->most hated<-
My fucking wonderful life (yeah right)   
10:34pm 11/06/2004
  Well im really getting to the point where im going to go crazy. I really like this kid but he has no idea that i like him. I need a chance but i know that im not going to get it. We dont even hang out of school that much and most of the time i think he thinks im the most annoying loser int he world. But even tho he says he doesnt hate me i dont believe him. He has said that he doesnt hate other people but he did. (wow sounds like alot of people i know) Well im deffinitly in need of a change. I have no friends and it sux so much. Its like everyone hates me. Brandy is trying to get kristen not to talk to me but theres really no one that i can talk to about shit that goes on in my life. I lost my best friend moving, and i thought i found i new one but one shes moving, and i wasnt her best friend by far she was just mine...just shows how pathetic i am. o well now i know that i dont have anyfriends. I defintly going to bed because im tired and so sick of my life. Peace

->Most hated<-
New ColorS   
10:44am 09/06/2004
mood: determined
do you like my new colors? I do
10:12am 09/06/2004
mood: worried
IM really worried about kayla right now. No one in this school let alone at her house knows where she is. Everytime someone calls her at home shes never there or no one picks up, and her cells shut off so we cant talk to her at all. I just wish she would call someone to let them know whats goin on because everyone is gettin worried about her. Its been 6 days since anyone has talked to her. Today im gonna call sean and were gonna three way kaylas house and if kaylas mom says that she doesnt know where she is im gonna start flippin out. She should know where her own kid is. And if her moms boyfriend is treatin her kid like shit then she should lose her boifriend because thats not right. Everyone cares to much about her for her to get hurt. Well im gonna go because mr dery might start yellin at me because im using the computer. BUt he seen me and he hasnt yet. But w/e i dont have anything else to say. Peace

->Most Hated<-

09:21pm 08/06/2004
DBazin1: NO, I don't expect anything from you. You are not a kind and caring person.

wow my grandmother said that to me. I really fucking give up on everythihng im so tired of living its so pointless.


DBazin1: Your not caring
09:08pm 08/06/2004
mood: hopeful
Well well well. Today was an okay day, wasnt the greatest but it wasnt the worst. First i went to school and nothing happend really there, same old crap as always. Then i came home and went to go get my hair cut but i had this asian chik and i couldnt understand anything she was sayin so i was just saying yes to all her questions. It was pretty funny...good thing my hair didnt turn out bad. Then i came home and first my mom dyed it brown then she put blond streaks and tomorrow shes doing red. I really dont want to go to school tomorrow. Amber invited me to go to the ocean with her and her mom and brother and i think keith too. I really want to go and i think that it would be good for me because its been really stressful lately. My friends moving, finals are staring soon and im studying so hard i dont think that my mom understands that i really am trying and thats why i need a break. I have been doing almost all of my school work and its really surprising me, but when i get the grade in the end. Atleast i hope the grade will be good. i really need to get away from this house for a while. Cant wait until schools over and i get to try to have a life ( we'll see how that turns out) Well im about to get off line because my crazy drunk grandmother is being super gay. Peace

->Most Hated<-